Retrieval news (IVF/ICSI #2)

You may remember that 13 is my lucky number, and that 13 eggs were retrieved with last month's cycle on Monday, the 23rd. Well, today's retrieval on Monday, the 23rd, yielded the exact same number of eggs: 13.

How very consistent of the universe and my beautifully bloated ovaries. I'm particularly ecstatic with that number, since my ovaries were distorted by ginormous endometriomas just 3 months ago. I never thought we'd retrieve any of my own eggs, let alone 13!

As I write this, I'm acutely aware of so many of you who are contemplating DE, going through a DE cycle, and others who have done multiple DE cycles. Infertility is so unfair, and even as I'm celebrating my victory today, my heart breaks for you. To my friends with Endo who are TTC, if you need an operative laparoscopy or laparotomy, go the extra mile to find the best surgeon money can buy. Seriously.

Dh has much to celebrate today too, as the urologist found sperm with PESA... again! Last month, there was not one motile sperm to be seen after 16 attempted aspirations and four uses of the dreaded gun. We were just happy that they found tadpoles resembling sperm, but none were swimming. Despite ICSI, we ended up with bad quality embryos. Today, lo and behold, the urologist hit the epididymal jackpot.

I was already prepped for ER, complete with IV and heart rate monitors, and anxiously awaiting news. Nothing like sitting there all ready but alone, watching the clock, knowing you'll be ovulating any second, and waiting for news on the sperm front. Tick tock. Tick tock.

My reproductive endocrinologist popped into the OR, silently, but with his hand held up as if to "high five" me. "You won't believe this," he said with a huge grin. "They found lots of beautiful, motile sperm this time!" He went on to tell me how he made the urologist "visualize the healthy sperm" before doing the aspiration. My RE believes in a holistic approach, combines western and eastern medicine, and encourages his patients to go for acupuncture.

"The urologist doesn't believe in that stuff and always pooh-poohs me and my visualizations, but I made him do it anyway!" he said, chuckling. This time, they filled 3 vials with 3 sperm aspirations, and can pick and choose to find the best 13 swimmers to fertilize my eggs.

Hubby came into the OR, gloating. He told me he saw the little guys swimming on the microscope's monitor and how he just couldn't believe it. It is more than 15 years since his vasectomy, and a decade since the failed reversal. We didn't think there were any motile sperm to be had.

Another funny moment was when the anesthesiologist asked me about any prior surgeries. I rattled off the surgeries. "Are you in the medical field?" I laughed, and said, "No." What I was thinking: "No, but I have a degree from Goo.gle."

I soon fell into a happy, Versed-induced "sleep" as Dh held my hand. The ER was over before I knew it. A little spotting, a little cramping, but nothing bad. I didn't need Tyle.nol.

We had left the clinic when the nurse practitioner left a voicemail on the cell. "Nothing to worry about, just give us a call when you get this message," she said. Of course, we worried. We called, and the cherry on top is that they want us to sign a consent form so they can cryopreserve all the gorgeous, extra, healthy sperm. Is this really happening? It feels like I'm living a dream, except I've done my first PIO ever and my hiney is hurting, so it must all be real.

My incredible husband is still on cloud 9. He's the man. Normally, he doesn't say a whole lot on the fertility topic and just kind of takes things as they come, but he can't stop telling me about seeing his own "real, live, swimming sperm!" As in, "not a photo, not a frozen image, not somebody else's. They were really swimming. Fast!"

Can this day get any better?

The day before retrieval

ICLWers, welcome! Please share your ER stories with me to get me through today. Your comments mean the world to me.

Ahhh! Finally, a day off from injections. I'm feeling optimistic about tomorrow's egg retrieval, and of course a little scared, but mostly excited and calm. I keep telling myself it can't possibly be worse than the Endo lap surgery two months ago.

It helps that today is Sunday, and I had homemade, organic scones for breakfast. I'm listening to good music, visiting IComLeavWe blogs, calling my family and generally just chilling.

Usually, I'm a workaholic stress case, an undeniable type A personality who needs to control everything. It's a new feeling to try to be good to myself, to take it easy, to relax, and to let go. I practiced this approach with great success last weekend (see Sleepy Tiger in Sleepy Clothes post) and I'm working on perfecting it today. I have the week off from work to stay sane between ER and Tx, which bodes well for becoming an IComLeavWe Iron Commenter. A girl has to have goals. ;-)

Dh's aspiration is at 6:45 tomorrow morning. We don't know if they'll find sperm, but the RE said he was so sure they would, he'd give us the cycle free if they came up empty-handed. After 11 years and a failed vas reversal, we'll finally know if the boys are coming to the party.

My clinic does ICSI for everyone's IVF cycles. It's included in their regular IVF fee. I'm relieved they do this on a regular basis, and that we'll maximize our chances if they only find a few viable sperm.

My ER is at 8:30. No food or drink after midnight tonight, and no strong smelling perfume/hair spray/cologne allowed. I use natural products with little scent, so this is good news for me. Strong smells can easily trigger my migraines. Jasmine, hazelnut coffee brewing, strong perfume. Blegh. Makes me instantly nauseous. I can't go near Y.anky Candle or the perfume counter at department stores.

Based on what I've read on the blogs, I'm expecting to do a whole lot of sleeping and cramping after ER... Sounds like a good time.